camelon, coach, community, development, Our Place, Support, tamfourhill

Coaching 1 to 1

Community Coach Blog, Dan Rous, 29 April 2021

At our First Anniversary Celebration event on Monday, I officially launched a 1 to 1 coaching programme that is FREE for you, the lovely people of Camelon and Tamfourhill. This is not sports coaching, but personal development coaching to help you, the coachee, to fully live out your potential – whether that is personal or professional. The goal of coaching is for the coachee to discover insights about themselves, and to take action in reshaping their life.

The video below is my talk from the event where I explain what Coaching is and crucially, what coaching isn’t. This can really make a difference in your life and help you move into the potential that is within you – no matter what stage you’re at.

If you don’t fancy watching the video, then you can read things for yourself below that. Once you’ve watched or read, if you want to book in for a series of coaching sessions with me, or to find out more for yourself or someone you’d like to refer, then please email me at communitycoach@tamfourhilltro.co.uk and we’ll have a conversation. There’s also more information over at our dedicated 1 to 1 Coaching page.

What is 1 to 1 Coaching?

Coaching is an ongoing conversation that empowers a person to fully live out their potential – both personal and professional. The goal of coaching is for the coachee to discover insights about themselves, and to take action in reshaping their life.

The coaching relationship is expected to encourage insights, to facilitate greater personal awareness, to change behaviours, to initiate actions and, ultimately, to produce outcomes that satisfy the coachee.  Much is expected of them: it is their responsibility to imagine, reason, identify, plan, decide, and implement their goals.

What Coaching Is

Coaching is about the coachee – their goals, their learning, and their growth. Together, coach and coachee will discover the potential within them.

Coaching is about learning – rather than teaching. The coachee is the expert on their life. A coach uses coaching techniques such as deep listening, open questions, encouragement, feedback, and always remaining supportive.  The focus is on assisting the coachee in discovering insights and taking next steps in pursuing their calling.

Coaching is about action – the coachees action. Each session the coachee will determine 1-3 actions steps to take before the next session. It may be surprising how quickly the coachee will progress toward their goals.

Coaching is about all of the coachee – not just work or personal life.  We all know that altering old habits and thought patterns is difficult. A coach recognises these patterns and will support the coachee as they change and grow.

What Coaching Isn’t

It is not therapy.  Although many of the communication techniques are the same, like active listening, reflecting, use of questions, limited advice giving, etc., therapy focuses on the past to bring healing and unblock a person so they might move ahead. Coaching is future and action-oriented – for people who are basically free of debilitating psychological or emotional issues.

It is not mentoring. Mentors are experts in a particular field who seek to pass on their expertise to a person. Mentors provide knowledge, advice, guidance, correction, and encouragement to people who are newer and junior—by experience if not by position or age. Mentors usually play the roles of advisor and teacher to guide and impart knowledge and wisdom.

It is not training. In training, the trainer sets the agenda. Changes are imposed from outside the participant, via the trainer. In coaching, the coachee sets the agenda. Coaches use adult learning principles of self-discovery to motivate change from within their coachee.

It is not authoritarian. Did you have a tough sports coach who used to yell at you and make you do a million push-ups if you made a mistake? That’s not coaching. A coach will push a coachee beyond what they might think they can do, but will always be supportive. The coachee is in control. The desire and responsibility to choose and act belongs to the coachee – and them alone.

Why Does Coaching Work?

Coaching works because it brings out the best in the coachee; a coach believes that coachees can create their own best answers and is trained to support them in that process. During coaching sessions, a coach will:

  • Listen. The coachees story is central. A coach is fully engaged in what they are saying, encouraging them to discover what their potential is.
  • Ask questions. A coach uses questions to stimulate the coachees thinking and creativity. Questions are about possibilities and the future.
  • Encourage. Everyone needs encouragements, and usually we don’t get enough. A coach will hold and honour their coachees vision, progress, and efforts.
  • Facilitate while letting you lead. A coach facilitates learning and problem solving.

A coach is not in charge, nor do they set the agenda.  A coach is simply here to help the coachee to engineer their future.

Why Use a Coach?

The reasons people want coaching are endless, and as unique as the person. Here are a few examples that motivate people to use a coach.

  • To make significant life changes
  • To make better decisions
  • To set better goals and reach them faster
  • To address changes in location or employment
  • To reduce stress, isolation, or uncertainty
  • To progress personally
  • To improve your relationships
  • To make a bigger impact on the world
  • To be a better leader
  • To better understand who you are
  • To simplify or prioritize your life
  • To evaluate your pace of life

Our Coaching approach

  1. Leverages Strengths
  2. Provides Clarity and Focus
  3. Instils Confidence
  4. Catapults Learning
  5. Fosters Intentional Progress
  6. Rubs Off on Others
  7. Encourages achievable Goals/Dreams

You will never maximize your potential in any area without coaching. It is impossible. You may be good. You may even be better than everyone else. But without outside input you will never be as good as you could be.

Andy Stanley, The Next Generation Leader

So, does this sound like it could be of help to you or someone you know/work with? Then get in touch and let’s get started! Drop me an email at communitycoach@tamfourhilltro.co.uk to start the process.

Until next time…

camelon, coach, community, development, Our Place, resilience, Support, tamfourhill

Exploring Coaching

I’m now 3 1/2 months into this new role and even with the restrictions, it’s been great to be able to provide remote support to those groups and individuals that have requested it. There’s still a few projects and on-going support happening, and I know there’s much more to tap into. However, there are still some of you out there who aren’t quite sure what it is that I do!!

In normal times I would have sat down in a cafe with you and had a chat, but that’s not been entirely possible of late, so for now, this is my best method of getting the information across. (I’ll still happily buy you a coffee in the near future though!)

My last few blogs have all been on the theme of motivation, planning and finding direction, which is essentially what my role is about – helping you to develop the skills necessary to help shape your own, and if appropriate your organisations, future. With previous local support activities, you’ve had people who will take your issue and do something to sort it for you. That is absolutely great and there are some amazing people providing this kind of support for groups across the country. But what happens if that same issue comes up again. What did you learn from that support? Would you be able to sort things out if left to your own devices? How can I, as your Community Coach, help you with that? Let’s explore the work of Coaching further:

Coaching (ˈkəʊ.tʃɪŋ). Noun. The job or activity of providing training for people or helping to prepare them for something:  Coaching helps people to self-critique and self-regulate their behaviour to achieve the things they want.

Cambridge English Dictionary

Coaching is the process of coming alongside someone to help them get clarity and confidence in addressing life’s opportunities. Coaching is not about mentoring.  It’s not about counselling. There are plenty of great mentors and counsellors that I can direct you to if that’s what you’re needing. Coaching is about asking questions and allowing people to think things through, as that’s the most profound way they will learn. Coaching is not about telling people what to do, or worse, doing it for them, but about listening well, asking insightful questions, and helping people on their way. Asking somebody the right questions, helps them to discover the answers to things inside them that they didn’t realise they had the answer to. Essentially, coaching can bring an individual or organisation fully alive into who or what they were meant to be. No matter what has happened in the past. No matter what others say. You have the right to access the opportunities that exist in order to be the person you were meant to be. We all need to grow.

If we’re honest, you probably could do this on your own, but its hard. Allowing another person – a coach – to help you look at what you’re doing, can help bring fresh perspective and open up the answers you were missing. In most cases, the things that you want to figure out will be things that you already know of or had thought about, or things for which there are resources close by but you don’t have the time or head space to make that happen.

So, what is the narrative that’s stuck in your head? Is there something you’ve been stuck in and never able to climb over? Coaching helps you to discover that and to move on and progress into your full potential. It can help you find an oasis in a desert.  Do more in less time.

All the answers are within you already.  My role as a coach is to help you draw them out, and move forwards. And that goes for organisations as well as individuals. You may be looking to move your organisation to the next level or do something different and you can’t see how it could work. You may be stuck in a rut of something that’s always worked but is beginning to struggle or fade away now. As a coach, I can help you to navigate your way out of that rut by helping you look and think about things differently.

Let me be honest with you here. This whole coaching thing benefits me as the coach as well as you, the person receiving the coaching. For years I have used the statement on my CV and LinkedIn profile that I “develop projects that enable people and communities to be developed”. I love doing this as it brings me genuine pleasure. I also learn from it too. I may have developed and assisted numerous projects but I am always learning. The coaching process helps me to continue to learn and understand communities as I assist the person being coached.

When I encountered the powerful leadership tool of coaching, everything changed. It was like a gust of wind filled the sails of my heart and life.

Tom Camacho

So how do we do this Coaching thing together? The first and biggest step is to make contact. Phone, email, social media, carrier pigeon – whatever works for you – just get in touch. That is a big step in itself but once taken, can open up the journey for you to begin to feel the joy of fruitful effectiveness that lines up with how you were made. I will then take time to listen and understand where you’re at, where you want to go, and with your agreement, begin to work with you on the steps to get there.

There are 5 steps on the Coaching journey, all helpfully beginning with the letter R:

  • Relate: Together we establish the coaching relationship and set an agenda for what needs to happen;
  • Reflect: Through questioning and conversation, we discover and explore the key issues that need tackling;
  • Refocus: I will help you to determine the priorities, what action steps are needed, and help you understand how they can be achieved;
  • Resource: I will support you, train you, connect you and provide constant encouragement through good and bad;
  • Review: Together we will evaluate what has happened, learn from any issues that occurred along the way, celebrate the result, and review plans for the next phase.

It sounds simple and essentially it is! Yes there will be some difficult hurdles to overcome but facing them with someone else who can help you, makes the process so much easier. And being part of a wider community helps too. The Kemlin Kin Group is a partnership of local residents and leaders of organisations and groups who are already active in the local area or have a passion to see things grow. You could join that group as well if you live in the Camelon and Tamfourhill area, and find the benefit of a network of people who want to bring an increase in positive activity and opportunities locally. Get in touch to find out more.

So that’s it. Coaching in a nutshell! All that’s left for you to do is contact me and let’s start a conversation. Before I go though, have a look at this short animation of what the coaching journey can be. I hope this all helps, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Dan Rous: communitycoach@tamfourhilltro.co.uk 07444 873151